Our capacity to reason, to store memory, to build and link ideas, stories and concepts separates us from any other species on the planet. The size and capability of the human brain allows us to feel, remember, love and complicate things. Wired for more than our next meal, what makes us human is fascinating and complex. To make sense of all the happenings in the mind, we rely on logic. If you can explain where you are coming from, why you feel this way, prove truthfulness and sound confident enough, you're using logical reasoning.
A majority of us find security in proof. Hypothesis + Evidence = Truth
Right? Let's test this theory.
Hypothesis: If you practice yoga everyday you will lose weight.
Evidence: X number of people in CA who practice yoga everyday lost weight.
Truth: If you practice yoga everyday you will lose weight.
Hypothesis: If your thighs don't touch you will be happier.
Evidence: X number of people in Hollywood have thighs that don't touch and their Instagram feed portrays happiness.
Truth: If your thighs don't touch you will be happier.
We like to rationalize because in doing so we can quiet the chaos that is happening around us and within us all the time. We feel safe when things make sense because so much of what happens around the world doesn't. So, you show me your proof and it checks out as logical, therefore I take it as absolute truth.
The problem here is that the mind, though powerful, can be the very thing that keeps us from experiencing the magic in life. The serendipitous moments, the freaky coincidences, the I-don't-know-how-this-just-happened-but-it-was-extraordinary. When these happenstances present themselves there is less focus on logic and more attention on feeling and emotion. When we experience magic moments we allow them to fill us up completely. We don't run to our textbooks to solve the occurrence or pick it apart- we simply experience it.
So much of life is up for interpretation, imagination and the extraordinary. Reality looks a thousand different ways depending on the eyes you are looking out from. If you are always seeking a logical explanation for everything you experience in life, you remove the mystery, the fun and the surreal from the landscape. If you allow yourself to play along, you just might find yourself immersed in tiny, wonderful, awe-inspiring moments.
Weeks leading up to S I S T E R R O O T S, an 8 week women's workshop I'm holding, the pressure has been heavy and I have placed it on myself. Last week I was focusing on the numbers and the marketing and the facts. Other women had done this and this was their output. Or, this amount of time and energy went into this, therefore I should get this out of it. Reasoning my way through the fear and anxiety. It felt safe to rely on logic, using it as a tool to keep me from being vulnerable, honest and real with myself and arising emotions.
Saturday brought the stories I kept in silence to myself out for everyone to hear. I told my sister I felt like a failure. I told one of my closest friends that I wasn't sure if the group was going to take off the way I had imagined. I started to cry. I worked so hard and wanted to bring this kind of work to life and because I was so focused on making sense of it all, I didn't allow any room to trust. To trust that I'm where I'm supposed to be. That all is unfolding as it should. To believe in the magic conspiring around me.
I released what was weighing me down and realized by sharing these stories that it all sounded crazy. That I am by no means a failure. That this workshop will be exactly what it's supposed to be. That who I am and where I am going in terms of success is up for me to choose. I decided success for me would be 1. Showing up to share this material 2. Giving the women in the group my genuine presence and appreciation for their courage and 3. To be content with what does take place.
The next day I got a call from a woman interested in doing the workshop. She shared with me over the phone how badly she needed something like this. That it was about time to take care of herself. My first contact for the workshop from outside of my personal social sphere. I was ecstatic. The next day I heard from a fellow yogi that wanted in on the workshop. Today I went to the bank after my morning yoga and ran into a family friend I hadn't seen in years. She asked what I was up to and I began to talk about the workshop. Within moments she committed to joining, throwing her arms around me in excitement for stumbling upon each other when she needed it most.
The name of the game isn't just hard work. Beating ourselves up and pushing through each task, giving personal punishment regardless of the outcome. The hard work is the easy part. The hard part is letting go of the outcome. Trusting that in the right time, in the right place, in the right way, you will be met.
Each time I get lost in logic and explanation I remind myself of what has happened in the past when I choose to believe. When I let go of trying to make sense of everything around me, labeling it and giving it a place to live, I create so much room for the magical to take place.